It takes a lot of pain for me to ragequit a server these days. The two reasons I ragequit are 1. the presence of osi-quality snipers on the other team and 2. the server’s next map being ctf_2fort (unfortunately, the cancel button doesn’t work half the time). And why is that? Why do I hate 2fort so much?
2fort sucks. Yes, it does. If it were a good map, I wouldn’t waste over 1500 words on bashing it!
I’ll come back to that in a minute. First, a very brief detour.
I swear I never meant to let it die
I just don’t care about you anymore
It’s not fair when you say that I didn’t try
I just don’t care about you anymore
Three Days Grace was perhaps referring to a fictitious woman when they wrote “Let it Die”-and while not my favorite song by any metric, it accurately describes my love-hate relationship with the mess that is 2fort.
When I started playing TF2, back when you all were little babies (who always cried), the first map I tried was good old ctf_2fort. It was an instant hit with me.
This was in the heady days of early TF2, back when the soldier could spam rockets, back when the pyro couldn’t compression-blast. Playing on 2fort, I got acquainted with the playstyle of TF2. I won’t even pretend like I was a good player–I was NOT–but I had a lot of fun nevertheless. (I had a different pseudonym back then, too, so I’m not identifiable to the people who dominated me and might remember me :D).
After hours of playing 2fort, I crossed the Rubicon and joined a Dustbowl/Gravelpit server. I was smitten, and I completely forgot about 2fort. Gravelpit, of course, represents all classes very well. It’s also a very well-designed map with a lot of thinking involved in its design. For instance, while the open spaces of the map make the map very scout friendly, concentrating health packs in enclosed spaces where scouts are more vulnerable balances that advange. Pretty nice map, I gotta say.
And then there’s Dustbowl. In spite of the slight imbalance, it’s brilliant, case closed. Along the same lines, Goldrush is also incredibly fun, despite the immense defensive advantage.
But 2fort is the most inherently flawed map that Valve has released. Among an otherwise excellent repertoire of official maps, 2fort is the odd one out. The black sheep. The map I wish never existed. Yes, 2fort absolutely sucks. It sucks worse than a crappy custom map. And here’s why. In no particular order, these are my top five reasons why you should stop playing 2fort NOW and move on to better maps. You don’t agree with me? You think I’m a goddamn prick? Sound off in the comments!
Weighted Companion Snipers
madlep has ranted before against these useless fools who do little more than waste server bandwidth. 2fort is an amazingly sucky map for snipers. The only good place to snipe from is the exposed balcony. From there, just about the only place a sniper can get a good, clear shot is the opposing balcony, and here’s proof! (It’s normally too dangerous to look down at the lower base exit, because of the danger of countersniping from the opposite balcony). The giant covering over the bridge makes it impossible to easily snipe classes on the bridge. Snipers on the map inevitably get involved in unproductive, boring, and useless sniper duels. Of course, the covering over the bridge isn’t ALL bad–it does allow scouts a shortcut to the intel room. But if you want a shortcut to the intel room, how hard would it be to have a staircase up from ground level straight to the sniper deck? That happens to be my next complaint.
The Bridge
Let’s admit that it can be tricky to double-jump from the bridge covering onto the opposite sniper deck. If you do miss the rather fickle double-jump then you’ll have to tramp through extra corridors (as if 2fort doesn’t have enough of corridors to tramp through!). There’ll undoubtedly be sentries to negotiate as you run up the stairs in the fort’s courtyard. Combined with a lack of any sort of health pack in this area, there’s a good chance that you’ll get damaged pretty badly without hope of recovery. Of course, it blocks a clear shot for snipers–effectively neutering the otherwise deadly class’s effectiveness. If you are unlucky enough to be knocked off the top off the bridge (possibly by an explosion - soldiers love spamming rockets at the top of the bridge), then you’ll have to deal with something even more tedious. If the idea is to offer a shortcut to the intel through the sniper deck, there are much better ways to do that (example: staircase up to the sniper deck or, barring that, a pile of debris on the side that allows scouts to climb up by means of double jumping). For instance, on the last stage, last cap of Goldrush there’s a small pile of debris on the side of the sniper deck that I often use when playing spy to climb up and backstab snipers. Since it doesn’t limit the attacking effectiveness of snipers but increases their vulnerability to spies (the sniper deck is otherwise inaccessible), it’s a good design element.
Above: a watery hell. Stolen from tf2wiki.
The water and sewers
The fact that I have a key bound to kill myself speaks to just how freaking boring this map becomes when you fall in the water. Unless you’re a soldier or a demoman with a reasonable amount of health, it’s impossible to jump out of the water and back onto the bridge area. You’re instead left with a pretty terrible choice. You can negotiate 300 miles of long, straight sewers and surface in the enemy base, or you can negotiate 300 miles of long, straight sewers and surface in the relative safety of your own base. (That’s assuming that an enemy engineer hasn’t built a sentry in your sewers, which is surprisingly common). Attempting to push into the enemy base from this clearly disadvantageous position is often suicidal. Fun maps have fast-paced gameplay and concentrated action. This happens to be my chief complaint against CTF maps in general- unlike CP maps, where all the action is intensely concentrated on 1 or 2 control points, the action on CTF maps is spread out sparsely all over the map like butter spread too thin.
The basement
So you’ve passed the gauntlet of snipers, sentries, and other trash that litters the dirty corridors of 2fort. But your trip isn’t over yet. Now you have to tramp through more long, boring corridors. As if there aren’t enough of those already! And it doesn’t even stop there. Looks like there are more sentries down in here! If you’re a scout, this is unbelievably frustrating–after a minute of dodging idiots, you get nailed right next to your goal.
And even if you manage to successfully pick up the enemy intelligence, getting out of the basement is just as boring. A single demoman can defend the intel without any problems. Out of the two exits from the intel room, one is a deathtrap and the other one takes you past the enemy courtyard. Let’s admit that teamwork really lacks on this map. Your average player considers this map as a giant deathmatch. It’s usually not worth the trouble of trying multiple times to capture the intel and dying every time when one can simply kill the enemy and retain one’s dignity. As a result, intel room defense rarely gets cleared. Even spies, who can easily kill sentries, pretty much suck overall down in the intel room. They’re so vulnerable, and without their ability to disguise and cloak, they rarely make it out of the enemy base alive.
And, of course, pity the engineer!
Engineering here is BORING
While sentries are common on 2fort, using them for defense is terribly boring. Unlike CP and PL (payload) maps, where the action is focused on a certain point, 2fort’s battles occur all over the place. On CP and PL maps, an engineer building close to the CP or the cart can expect a steady stream of n00bs to kill. On most locations on 2fort, it’s hard to guarantee whether anyone will come by your sentry. And it seems like if anyone comes across your sentry, it’s a spy. One of the few places where you can expect lots of kills is the bridge, but attempting to build there is hard, what with the hordes of soldiers dropping down from the battlement and spamming rockets at the opposite side. While I do consider engineer to be the dullest class out of the nine, I can still have a decent time on a good map.
But, to be frank, ctf_2fort isn’t one of them good maps. TF2’s specialty is fast-paced, intense, concentrated gameplay, and 2fort has barely anything to offer in that deparment. Forcing people to walk extra distances just to get health, ammo, or the intel is bad design philosophy. Walking through 2fort’s massive network of corridors takes a long time, and the map’s design practically forces you to walk.
So people, I don’t understand how you guys can be so neurotic. 2fort is TF2 at its worse, yet it still manages to survive.
But you won’t be seeing me around. I’ll be on Goldrush if you want me.
If you could spare a couple of bucks, it would be appreciated. See the little donate link on the side? Click it, or don’t click it. Whatever. But a nice triple-shot long black espresso would sure help out getting new stuff done on the site.
